U. Florida should heed city laws in post-BCS revelry

The Editorial Board understands that college students will be, well, college students come Thursday evening.

Two days from now you will diligently trade in your notebooks for Natural Light, and laptop for lemon drops.

Unless you go to UF, how often does your football team make the championship game, anyway?

While we’d all like to be in Miami to see the game in person, staying local is easily the second best option.

From beer pong to ice luges, Gainesville (sorry Norman) will prove to be a mecca of partying, debauchery and if things unfold as we expect — celebration as the Gators take home the BCS championship.

We realize everyone celebrates in their own unique manner. Many students will descend upon University Avenue for peaceful rioting, while others will gleefully buy rounds of shots for complete strangers at Gator’s Dockside.

The Editorial Board asks that you pay careful attention to Gainesville’s laws and refrain from relishing the victory by starting a bonfire. Don’t end your night early by getting arrested for having a 12–foot–flame burning in your backyard. Even worse, we would hate to see you make a poor decision and ruin everyone’s fun by spending the evening in the hospital.

Run around campus proclaiming your love for Tim Tebow or ascend upon Florida Field and pretend you are Louis Murphy catching the game–winning touchdown.

You still have a hankering for fire? Tune in Thursday to see Percy Harvin burn corners and Jeff Demps smoke safeties — a bonfire for Oklahoma’s BCS chances.

No Mercy: Post–BCS hangovers don’t matter to Machen

Apparently reaching the pinnacle of the college football world doesn’t mean much to UF President Bernie Machen, who seems to think championships are as commonplace as players like Oklahoma’s outspoken Dominique Franks.

As Thursday’s BCS National Championship Game looms, the Editorial Board advises you not to make the trip down to Miami — unless of course you don’t mind suffering the consequences in the classroom.

Past years have seen a kinder and more sympathetic Bernie advising professors not to punish students for missing class the day after the game as they travel home or recover from celebrating on University Avenue.

With excellence becoming synonymous with UF athletics, Machen has refused to extend a grace of sorts to students as current plans for Friday call for business as usual on campus.

We as students can’t help the fact that UF happens to start its spring semester earlier than many other schools — heck, our opponents don’t go back to class until Jan. 20.

The Editorial Board isn’t expecting a major shift in the academic calendar – just a mutual understanding that we might not be in class on Friday.

Is it too much to ask for the opportunity to enjoy in the success of our team without having to worry about the academic repercussions?

Sharing in the success of the UF football team should unite the administration, staff and students – not cause a divide. We are talking about the first Friday of the first week of school, hardly the week before finals.

It’s never too late for a new year’s resolution, Bernie.

Blackwater contractors worst case of Bush cronyism

Ever since the U.S. — err, George and Dick — strong–armed its way into the Middle East under the guise of the tragically flawed Bush Doctrine, Blackwater has reaped the vast financial benefits of government contracts.

Are they construction contractors, truck drivers or, dare I ask, peacemakers? Sure they are, if upholding peace constitutes using illegally acquired assault rifles to open up a can of whoop–ass on a group of 17 unsuspecting, unarmed and utterly harmless Iraqis in Nisour Square. Not to mention many of these weapons ended up on the black market in the streets of Iraq.

It’s hardly shocking to see Republican cronies turn a blind eye to protect the mercenaries who are part of the good ol’ boy network — until now.

News out of Salt Lake City on Tuesday finally shows a semblance of accountability as five Blackwater guards face charges of manslaughter for their aforementioned actions in Iraq.

What boggles my mind is how these men continue to avoid owning up to their actions as they seek to circumvent the law by surrendering in Utah.

Why did they decide to surrender in Utah when the case had already been assigned to a judge in Washington, D.C.?

Clearly more cunning than compassionate, Blackwater’s henchmen seek to exploit Utah’s reputation as a conservative state in hopes of having their fate determined by a group of their “peers.”

How do I define peers in this case?

Try right–wing, George–W.–Bush–worshipping, reduced–alcohol–beer–drinking, warmongering Republicans who will have them back on the streets of Iraq ready to kill before you can drop the “elect” from Barack Obama’s title.

Blackwater’s “soldiers of fortune” must have been facing nothing short of a torrent of danger to result in ending the lives of hoards of innocent people…right?

No hero shoots a victim who has his hands raised above his head in an obvious sign of surrender. There is no bravery in firing upon vehicles fleeing the scene in an effort to avoid any hint of further conflict.

Hell, why do you think the U.S. has such a piss–poor image abroad? Anti–American sentiment stems from our government holding every other country in the world to a fastidious standard while our daily course of action reveals an utter lack of adherence to any law.

President Bush, you wonder why you will go down as the worst president in history. I laugh as you scramble to assemble a crack–team to spin the last eight years in hopes of giving your legacy a scrap of credibility.

Sir, your work here is done. Turn off the faucet — there is no washing the blood off your hands this time. Nixon had his plumbers and we all saw how that turned out.

While our country’s leaders continue to play camp run–amok in the waning hours of a failed admi